Lots of mommy thoughts

Earlier this week my thoughts had been consumed with how many things I had left to do before the holiday, how many gifts each kid had, holiday parties and Christmas cards. I had a lot on my plate as usual with outgiving too much thought to anything else outside my little world. Funny how that can all change in a matter of mintues. When the news started coming in about the shooting in Connecticut, my heart started pounding. First because MY BABY was in an elementary school, miles down the road from me. Someone else was watching her, protecting her. This could’ve been her. Then the pictures started coming in. Of the moms. Of the dads. Waiting to know if their baby was going to be alright. If it was their baby that was dead. And my heart broke for them. Literally broke for them. Each one of them had probably kissed them goodbye, tucked them in the night before, counted the days till Santa, and moved the silly elf on the shelf for quick giggles before school. There just aren’t even words. My mind quickly darted from silly holiday worries to: Do my kids know just how much I adore them? Do they know that they are the best part of me or Josh? That they are literally my heart walking outside my body? Do they know? And then my mind also goes to the true meaning of this Christmas season…Jesus. How must have Mary felt? To watch her baby be slain on the cross? The faith she had to have. The torment it must have been for her. For Jesus, her baby, that was from her womb. To die for not only her sins but mine as well. Somehow I always seem to get Christmas wrong. I get caught up in the worldly things and don’t put enough focus on the really important things. This Christmas, my kids will get there gifts, but they won’t be rushed or hurried along. They will get more hugs than ever before; they will know more than ever that their mama loves them. And they will be reminded that Christmas isn’t about presents or Santa or even friends and family. Christmas is celebrating our risen King. He will be returning and oh what a glorious day that will be.